


Even Nesting Dolls Chip

by pritchtt



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Angst, Based off of song lyrics, Blink and you’ll miss it, Boys In Love, Fluff, Idiots in Love, M/M, Seblos, Song Lyrics, Theater gays, pure angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:08:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27580489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pritchtt/pseuds/pritchtt
Summary: [ UNFINISHED SONG FIC ]Mirroring his grandmothers forgotten memories, the cycle carried on; this time-round it would contain more than a doll placed into darkness. The antique would run deeper than a set of Nesting Dolls unable to be twisted open, the memories of its origins fading - it would contain a human who’d grown equivalent to the Nesting Dolls; 𝗱𝘂𝗺𝗯, 𝘄𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝘁𝗲.
Relationships: Seb Matthew-Smith/Carlos Rodriguez
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	Even Nesting Dolls Chip

**Author's Note:**

> Hi ! I have not posted in a while , so have an old scrap for seblos . I am not apart of the fandom anymore , but with it coming back I decided to just post this . It is not finished and never will be , but I think it had enough story for your imagination to continue on with .
> 
> This is based off of the song : Out Like a Light by the Honeybees .

[ Take me up right , strung up like a kite  
dumb, wicked, and white ]

Layers stacked upon each other formed to compose the interior known as: Sebastian Matthew-Smith; closely resembling a Nesting Doll cached into a cardboard-box. To be pushed into the depths of a colleens’ attic, besides old memories left to be forgotten - to make room for the new spawn of light. The layers of dolls molding together; corollas painted into the design fading through passing time. 

Leaving little but the shells of the antiques; painted scarlet cheeks, and beady-eyes the first observation as sunlight is bestowed upon the dolls. Ousted from the dark corner of the box, small hands wrapped around the dolls, confused on their find. Biting their tongue, Seb let out a small whine as the dolls shells refused to open, seemingly glued shut. Holding the dolls up to their elder brother Nathan, Seb pleaded with their eyes for help - the two young boys defying their grandmothers rules of the attic. 

“Sorry Sebster, I don’t think these dolls are meant to be opened.” Nathan gently spoke, handing the doll back down to his brother, turning on his heels to continue his own area-sweep. *Taken up tight*, Seb refused to believe there wasn’t more inside the cold-shell placed back into his hands. Pushing the dolls beneath his vest, Seb carefully made his way down the attic ladder, placing the dolls beneath his stack of flannels in his travel bag. 

Continuing the cycle, the Nesting Dolls now lay in the back of Seb’s closet, the view of it darkened over the years. Flannels that lost their grip on the hangers, falling onto the hidden doll. The antique slipping from his mind as he never found the strength to reveal the lost layers of the doll. Left often *strung up like a kite*, Seb never realized as before his eyes, he carried on the cycle. 

Mirroring his grandmothers forgotten memories, the cycle carried on; this time-round it would contain more than a doll placed into darkness. The antique would run deeper than a set of Nesting Dolls unable to be twisted open, the memories of its origins fading - it would contain a human who’d grown equivalent to the Nesting Dolls; *dumb, wicked, and white.*

[ Love me in spite ]

Shrinking in on them-self through instances of banter from their siblings, and mock from boys in the play-yard - Seb was in their stage of waiting to be rescued. A cold darkness surrounded them, nipping at their arms to bring small-bumps as reminders of their loneliness. He was trapped in a protection of their arms loosely wrapped around their torso; in hopes it’d provide an ounce of warmth through the bite of the dark.

Lost in them-self, their layers molded together making even them unsure of who the real Sebastian was. Years piled up of Seb laying in the corner, waiting for someone to twist their layers off; no one came. The artwork of music notes faded, leaving behind a blank canvas waiting to be found. The interior bursted in color, each doll leading to the smallest, brighter than the last; the smallest held the Seb he wished to show. The Seb he needed someone to break them open to. 

Their first speck of light came as the recently announced choreographer pulled them aside as they walked to the lunchroom. A small ray of light shone through the darkness over-coating them; the ice melting in the spots the other boys hand rested against their skin. 

“Hey Seb! Welcome back to school, as you heard the musical this year is High School Musical. I wanted to make sure you were auditioning!” Carlos spoke his words in jocund, as his eyes squinted at the forgetting of his glasses. 

Caught off-guard Seb mirrored the boy opposite to them, their eyes squinted resulting in their own vision blurry through their lenses. Mesmerized by the darkened eyes before them, Seb felt their heart skip a step as they swore hope sparkled in Carlos’ irises. Finding their voice, Seb finally spoke up, their voice lilt and their eyes darting down; “Uh- I planned to audition, but actually I was wondering if I could audition for Sharpay?”

“Of course you can! Just tell Miss Jenn what role you want when scripts are being handed out.” Carlos laughed, turning on his heel until he realized the others face drop. “Or- I can tell her for you, but I have to get going. See you around Seb!” He spoke before walking down the hallway, the opposite direction of the lunchroom, leaving Seb to stand with a light smile coating their features. 

The rest of the first day back didn’t flow as smoothly, but as Seb entered the theater and caught Carlos’s gaze, all felt right. That feeling would crash as after Carlos kept his word, he was pushed to the side on the piano. From a distance Seb watched Carlos’s eyes lock onto Ej. The darkness returning, a shiver running down their spine, as it dawned on them: their only use was filling in the spots needed.

-

Resting to a stop from their gyrate, arms wrapped around the younger boy, Seb took hold of their water-bottle resting besides their bag. Running their thumb along the cow-decal on their bottle, Sebs’ cheeks deepened in color as he thought on the constant practices that’s taken the slots of their time before school. He knew Carlos was sure the practice wasn’t much needed anymore, but something kept the boys schedule planted on these practices.

Standing besides their bag ready to leave the practice-room to head to their first period, Seb felt the hope die in their chest as Homecoming was merely hours away. He hadn’t expected the other boy to retaliate the feelings that ran deep through Sebs’ veins, but hope had ignited throughout the many practices; a fire of faith lit behind their irises.

“Well- are you busy tonight?” He heard as he started to close the zipper of their bag; ready to leave and forget the hope that ever bubbled. Caught off-guard, their walls built high Seb answered quickly, biting their tongue right after; wondering how stupid they must’ve sounded - ready for the invite to be torn from their hands, played off as a joke: “Tonight?”

“Yeah- you know! Homecoming?” Seb curses the way their voice tumbles as they speak; they’ve been dreaming of this moment since they first talked to the younger boy in seventh grade. When Carlos had asked for a pencil in math, in the same upbeat-confident voice he had now - well maybe a bit more confident then. It shouldn’t be hard to answer, but the simple word of yes was stuck in their throat, they were waiting for Carlos to laugh in their face for thinking this was reality.

“You mean like, you and I? Dancing together? In-front of like all the non-theater kids?” Seb questioned unable to keep a smiling from forming on their lips. Their heart beat rapidly in their chest, feeling the need to make sure Carlos knew what he was asking, but as Carlos confirmed. Seb could only reply with - “Send me a pic of what you’re wearing.” - before leaving the room, a giddy feeling taking over.

-

With the escape of their younger sister Emma-Maes’ cow Posie, Seb found them-self running over three hours late. Urging their elder sister to speed trying to miss as least as possible, Seb rushed inside as soon as he arrived. Spotting Carlos dancing alongside Ashlyn, as an old upbeat pop-song he’d hear blasting from their sisters room when they were younger, a smile formed on their lips.

Pulled from their moment of adoration, the song quickly changed to a slow-song before he could take a breathe and will them-self. Across the floor, Carlos’ dark-eyes met with their own, and as they saw the betrayal coat the others, they felt their heart drop; he couldn’t of already ended, what hadn’t even began.

A short exchange of apologies and reasons later; Seb found them-self back in the familiarity of Carlos’ arms. This time holding a nature disperse to their morning practices. Different then the times Carlos’ arms wrapped around them, helping them balance, or the times they stayed in each-others arms, gazing into the others eyes as they spun throughout the rest of ‘Bop to the Top.’ 

Melting into the warmth of Carlos’s light-grip against their torso as they swayed, Seb felt the layer of frost melt. Carlos’s touch burning in a way, he’d gently run their fingertips over the spots later that night, humming the song they danced to as their first layer started to crack. The faded music notes slowly returning, and the colors lightly illuminating the shell, matching the light that shone in Carlos’s eye, reflecting off his lenses.

Leaning in as the song closed to an end, Seb felt their lips ghost above the others own. Carlos’s hot breathes hitting their lips, the cold feel of his glasses resting against Seb. Both their eyes fluttered shut as Seb wrapped their arms around Carlos’s neck, whispering gently;

“Through all that happens, *love me in spite*?” With the final chords playing in the song, Seb pressed their lips against Carlos’s; forgetting all the worry they carried, all the hurt when Carlos opened up to them about his crush on Ej. The remembrance of Carlos’s look of betrayal, that looked so distant on his normally-confident features erased from their mindset. 

All they could think of was their reality, that was just a fire of hope in the back of their irises. Their mind was taken over by how the others lips fit against their own, and his hands in the small of Sebs back. The feeling reminded Seb of the glee he’d receive when he’d finish a hundred piece-puzzle; but he realized he had finished a puzzle that night. 

Though the puzzle was smaller than those he used to do, and didn’t form a picture of a field, or puppies, the same glee coursed through their veins. Carlos was their missing puzzle piece, and now that they were connected Seb would never let a child rip them apart, placing them into the darkness of a box.

[ If I betrayed our lonely nights spent out like a light   
With no kiss goodnight  
Would we ever fight when i’m away? ]

Sat on his elder sisters bed Seb watched as Braelynn, plucked a rose from the vase of flowers on her nightstand. Light music of love songs played from the record player sat on her dresser in the corner of the room. The scratch of the vinyl, skipping lyrics of the songs, resulting in Seb only knowing certain parts of songs growing up.

Slowly each red petal of the rose descended to the floor, as Braelynn plucked them one-by-one, whispering words as they fell. Watching her in puzzlement, Seb reached down to pick the fallen petals up before looking at his sister. Curiosity shining bright behind his bright orbs, he gently spoke up as he babied the crumbled petals in his arms.

“Why’d you tear apart the flower Brae?” Seb questioned as the stem of the rose was placed onto his pile. The seven year olds eyebrows furrowed together as he thought hardly on a reason she would do that. He watched the vase of roses be gifted to his sister the night before, from her girlfriend, and he remembered his mother always telling them to never ruin a present.

“Sebby you know how you collect dandelions i the backyard, and then blow on them while making a wish?” Braelynn questioned her younger brother, stifling a laugh at the broken flower he rested in his arms. “It’s just like that, except with these types of flowers, it’ll show you if your partner loves you or not.”

-

Resting the flower in their hands, twisting it between their fingers, Seb stared so heavily at the flower, a part of them was surprised it didn’t crumble in their grasp. They eyed the flower in a wish it would show the future, unaware of how their sisters trick couldn’t work for them as they never grew into the role she held; they grew into the role of the rose.

Laying the flower down on the windowsill, Seb watched the stars twinkle above. Their lips twisting into a frown as they remembered the nights they would share alongside Carlos. Cuddled into their warmth, as they dreamt of the future.

Restless stolen-evenings of the boys huddled in blankets, sat atop the roof of Seb’s barn as Carlos pointed out the constellations. Willing Seb to make wishes on the shooting stars as he pulled the blonde closer; shutting his eyes and wishing for a future with Seb by his side. Opening his eyes to be met with the sight of the moon contrasting Sebs pale-skin, bringing out their freckles. 

“*if i betrayed our lonely nights*” Seb dotted down in their journal; clutching it tight to their chest as anger coursed through their veins. Idents branded the crevasses of their fingers, keeping their hold on the small journal tight; jotting down the remains of the conflict of trust in abhorred. Though Seb was unsure of their future after their first fight, he knew he wouldn’t be showing up to the dell that evening.

Flowers covered the dell Carlos had invited Seb to for that night, the boys finding themselves often sneaking away. This night, marking their year anniversary Carlos decided to change the scenery up from the rooftop of Seb’s barn. 

Fight still fresh on his mind, he held out hope for the arrival of his other half. Plucking the nearest flower, he crushed it in his left-palm, letting the dust fly from his hand with the wind. Hastily standing up, Carlos decided to head home *spent out like a light*, and realizing there was no sign of Seb.

-

Running through the fields, a young girl plucked the petal of a rose, unaware of the universal effect it’d cause. Their relationship had taken form of the flower so many teenage girls depended their relationships on. Slowly over their time together the corollas were plucked from the stem, a chorus of “they love each other”, “they love each other not” ringing out from the skies above. 

Few petals remained clung to the stem of their own formed-rosette, as they lost touch of why they fell in love with each other. Intertwined heartbeats of love, turned into shared passings of anger as an argument broke out over the forgetting of a date, or the choice of a movie. 

-

Rain pattered down on the barn the boys found them-selves trapped in; working on chores around the Matthew-Smiths farm, they got trapped together as the skies turned gray. Senior year had snuck up on them, and they were halfway through with their relationship hanging on by threads; both boys focusing more on when they’d leave each other for college, than the future they once planned together.

Silence settled between them, as a layer of ash does on a pair of lungs, as the end closes to a near. Resulting in a sick-feeling that leaves them uncomfortable; itchy to get out of the situation they’re stuck in. Carlos looked across the barn at Seb, in an attempt to break the silence he found his voice: “Seb? You seem off- this doesn’t seem like you.”

“You act like you know me Carlos - you all do! When was the last time any of you actually knew who I was?” Seb snapped, their level of annoyance high from being stuck in the environment of the barn for the day. Throughout the years the group fell apart as Seb lost who he was meant to be. Life grew into a battle making it harder for Seb to retain their act of positivity; the pieces of their layers broke apart, and they never tried to rebuild them.

“You make it so hard to love you sometimes!” Seb sighed as venom coated their words; the normal blue hues flashing with red, as close to the last petal fell. Coming back to reality as he watched all love drain from the dark eyes across the barn, Seb clasped a hand over their mouth in shock. “Carlos..”

Jumping up from where he sat twisting straws of hay around his fingers, Carlos shot a pointed look at Seb. His heart weighed heavy in his chest; he knew they’d had issues, but he believed the other still held love for him. Stunned Carlos sat in his thoughts, before deciding it was best to leave.

Nearing the door Carlos turned back to Seb, “I’m sorry made it so hard, i’ll be on my way now. I’m going to get sick either way, it’d just be better to have a cold than be nauseous.” Carlos whispered heavily, his words slowly turning to venom as he slipped out of the barn *with no kiss goodnight.*

Slipping into his car, Carlos sighed deeply as he threw his glasses aside, the water droplets too heavy on them. His clothes weighed painful on his shoulders as they carried pounds of water, starting the car. Carlos pulled out of the Matthew-Smiths driveway as the last petal fell and one thought crossed his mind; *Would we ever fight when i’m away?*


End file.
